The Six Things I Can't Live Without, According To My Okcupid Profile:

- An awkward mix-tape from the 90's that we can't play because who has a tape deck anymore?

- The cool, refreshing taste of Diet Pepsi.

- Bread and milk, in case we get snowed in.

- The Thong Song.

- A giant cat that tells riddles.

- That weird gemstone that has my soul in it.