Criticisms of the Lord of the Rings Film Trilogy - Part One

Since I was but a little tyke, I've been a fan of J.R.R. Tolkein's The Lord of the Rings. The Hobbit was the first real book that I read to myself, and that's probably had a huge impact on my continued love of fantasy as a genre into my adult life. In the years before the films came out, I would re-read Lord of the Rings (or LOTR as it is often called, to save time,) every year. Only those who have known me for a long time would remember that the original reason I went to college pursuing a degree in film was because of my life long dream of adapting the Lord of the Rings to the big screen.

So it was with great and bitter disappointment that I learned, in 1997, still in the spring semester of my freshman year of college, that Peter Jackson, the film maker behind The Frighteners, had attained the rights to produce his own adaption. I hadn't even really begun my film development education before I lost all interest in the field due to this news. I hadn't realized how much I had put all of my eggs into one basket, so to speak, but without the dream of a LOTR film of my very own, I had had enough of film school. And yet, there were three years still to go. I eventually thought about doing some other projects, and if you'd like to see the films that came out as if in answer to my working on a script for a pretty much completely similar project go rent Election, Underworld, and Troy. Actually, in the case of Underworld and Troy, don't.

In retrospect, much like my friend John Davies' plan to make a big budget film about the sinking of the Titanic, I am comforted that my squelched dream would have been worth a shit load of money at the very least.

Despite this, and the obviously negative title of this piece, you should know that I was a huge fan of Peter Jackson's adaption of the Lord of the Rings. Its a daunting task to try and encapsulate Tolkein's book into three films, even ones that run over two and a half hours long, and I enjoyed them greatly when they came out on the big screen. The promise of a new Lord of the Rings film to look forward to each year made the grueling years of 2001-2003 pass by quite easily. Probably highest amongst the film's strengths is the stunning work of WETA, the workshop which designed and produced the costumes, sets, models and computer generated images for these films. For the most part, I couldn't have asked for more in the way the films looked. And let's not forget to mention that the cast is pretty much perfect, especially Ian McKellen as Gandalf.

That said, having been a fan of LOTR since I was seven years old has made me hard to please, and since I had been picturing my own version of this film for years, I've never been able to watch the films without my criticisms echoing in my head. In conversation after conversation I've bitched and moaned about the LOTR films, and its time for it to stop. Not because I don't enjoy it, but because its wasting too much of my time.

So, in an effort to waste less time complaining about LOTR, here are my main criticisms of the Lord of the Rings film trilogy:

PART ONE - THE FELLOWSHIP OF THE RING

This was, and still is, my favorite of the films, mainly because it is the one that is most true to the book on which it is based. This is odd, because if you've read LOTR you would know that the Two Towers and the Return of the King are by far the more cinematic of the books. Fellowship, on the other hand, is a very long, rambling narrative, and its not until Moria that the quest to destroy the ring picks up steam. But yet the film does a very admirable job of juggling between pulling back to show us the big picture while keeping ourselves grounded to the plight of the ring bearer.

There's a lot of great moments in this film, but the following are not some of them.

- "One by one, the free lands of Middle Earth fell to the power of the ring." So intones Galadriel in the film's prolouge, while a burning village in superimposed over a map of middle earth. Yet even the first time I watched the film I couldn't help but notice that the village very closely resembled the architecture of the country of Rohan, which figures so prominently in The Two Towers. Mind you, Rohan as a country didn't exist until after the "Last Alliance of Elves and Men" defeated Sauron at the end of the Second Age. So are we to believe that Sauron's forces somehow travelled through time and sacked a village of Rohan? Or, the more likely answer, that someone felt the need to show bad guys burning shit down for a few brief seconds, and they didn't want to go to the trouble of building another set? When Saruman's orcs and wild men burn down villages in the film of the Two Towers, I realized that this was where this footage had come from. It always serves to pull me out of the moment, no matter how many times I see it.

- When the ring is cut from Sauron's finger he begins to glow with the heat of a thousand suns, and then explodes in a shock wave that apparently knocks down all of the armies currently battling. I thought that this was overkill when I first saw it, and wondered how anyone at the epicenter of the blast could have survived, particularly Isildur. My feelings on this were further compounded when the eye of Sauron explodes in a similar shockwave in the third film, shattering the dark tower into a million pieces.

- "The Shire... 60 Years Later" After going through all the trouble of setting up the story in the beautiful prolouge, the film makers apparently decide that we might not realize that many years had passed since Bilbo Baggins found the ring in Gollum's cave, and add in this jarring message at the bottom of the screen, right after the title of the film. We discover this information later when Gandalf sees Bilbo again for the first time in many years and comments that he hasn't aged a day. Not only does this insult our intelligence, it also is presented in a font that seems totally out of place in these films.

- In the books Sauron's symbol is indeed a yellow eye, with a black slit for a pupil, rimmed with fire, and it is this fashion that he is perceived by Frodo the few times that he appears at all in the books. However, it is clear that Sauron is not physically a flaming eye. He is still takes the shape of a terrible dark lord, missing a finger from the hand on which he wore the ring. This image is important because, if you've read the books and seen the films you would know that Frodo also eventually loses the finger on which he wore the ring, creating some interesting connections between the dark lord and Frodo much like Harry Potter and Voldemort. What is more, in the books it takes Frodo quite awhile to finally see, naked and lidless, Sauron's eye. At first it appears to be a red star in the east, but as he approaches Mordor, and the burden of the ring grows heavier, the veils of shadow are stripped until Frodo vocally despairs to Sam that there is no veil between him and "ring of fire." Contrast this to the film, in which Sauron's eye appears again and again, starting with the brief flash as Gandalf's fingers come close to picking up the ring of power. This overkill strips Sauron of much of his mystique, and it doesn't help that his eye often looks to be nothing more than a giant flaming vagina.

- There are a number of annoying trends in the LOTR films, and one of them is the fact that the editors don't seem to believe that we will remember what happened earlier in the movie, particularly when it comes to Isildur's recovery of the ring from Sauron. The first time this happens is when Gandalf is researching the ring, so its pretty forgivable, but more on this later.

- One of the my biggest problems with the LOTR films is that Peter Jackson seems to feel that the only way to ramp up the tension of certain scenes is to make us think that a main character might have died, and then to reveal that, in fact, they didn't. Surprise! The problem with this technique is that it lessens the impact of the book's actual "false death" moments, particularly the biggest one of the whole story: Frodo "dying" after being stung by the giant spider Shelob. More on this later... But for now let me just bring up the first "false death" of the film: Gandalf being hurled towards the ceiling of Isengard by Saruman. Every time i see this film with someone who doesn't know the story, they invariably turn to me and ask: "Is Gandalf dead?" And I always say: "I guess you'll just have to find out."

- When Frodo puts on the ring at the inn of the Prancing Pony in Bree he apparently attracts the direct attention of Sauron himself, who apparently has something of a sense of humor, saying: "Ah. I see you." Get it? I / Eye see you? Ha. Aren't the Nazgul, who are drawn to the ring's power, threat enough? This scene is overkill, and highlights the overuse of the flaming eye as discussed above.

- The second "false death" scene of the trilogy occurs when we are meant to think that the Nazgul are stabbing our heroes while they are asleep in their beds. I don't have a problem with this particular scene, but I just wanted to keep track of how many times that "false death" occurs.

- I don't like the orc costumes in the scene in which Saruman begins to chop down the trees around Isengard. A nitpick to be sure, but since these are the first orcs we've really seen close up, that have actual lines beyond snarling, I would have liked better designs. In general the generic orcs in the film trilogy are nowhere near as intimidating as the Uruk-Hai, which makes sense, but after the climax of the Two Towers it makes the threat of Sauron's orc hordes seem less threatening. More on this later.

- Arwen wears different costumes in the first two shots in which she appears. The reason for this is that Frodo, having been stabbed by the poisoned Morgul blade, is seeing things on a more "pure level," much like the ring wraiths themselves. Its an interesting touch, but to tell the truth, I find the costume change kind of distracting, and I like the "real world" outfit that Arwen wears much better than her "wraith vision" dress.

- Apparently the Lord of the Nazgul, Sauron's second in command and a serious badass by all accounts, sounds a lot like Dr. Claw from the old Inspector Gadget cartoon. Trust me guys, there's nothing intimidating about the Dr. Claw voice.

- Third "false death" of the film: Frodo falls off of his horse, almost succumbing to the poison of the Witch King's blade. This is the first time in the books that we are led to believe that a main character might have died, though in the book (and the movie, to be fair) its pretty clear that he's blacking out. If you'll notice, it is at this point that Arwen chooses to pass on her immortality to Frodo, something which occurs after the ring has been destroyed and Frodo is hanging out in Minas Tirith in the books.

- I hate hate hate the weird overexposed shots of Frodo's head floating through a series of Rivendell backgrounds while Elrond's head appears as he attempts to heal him. The only thing I like about it is the way it ends.

- The second flashback to Isildur gaining possession of the one ring takes place while Elrond goes on about the weakness of men to Gandalf. Again, its forgivable at this point, especially since it adds a little bit more to the story and shows us the interior of Mount Doom... But more on this later.

- The Aragorn of the books may be a ranger, but by the time he leaves Rivendell he's pretty much ready to reclaim the throne of Gondor, with the reforged Narsil in his hands. Not so in the films, which give us the "Aragorn the reluctant king" plot line. I can see why Peter Jackson did this, and I actually think it works pretty well in this film, but the bottom line is that a subplot about Aragorn being unwilling or unsure of himself does nothing but eat up precious time, time which could have been spent covering events that did occur in the books, as we will see later.

- For the most part I find the dialogue of the LOTR films to be pretty decent, even though its a completely dumbed down version of the language of the books. But there's some points which stand out to me as glaringly modern. And the first is when, at the end of the Council of Elrond, Pippin states that the Fellowship of the Ring is going to need someone of intelligence on their: "Mission- Quest- Thing-" Thanks for ruining an otherwise epic moment Pippin. Dick.

- In the book, when Bilbo becomes much like Gollum in his desire for the ring, the transformation from kindly hobbit to a grasping, pathetic creature is quite sad. In the film this moment is played as a "gotcha" moment, in which Bilbo's face morphs into that of a Gollum-like monster. I would have preferred the sadder, less ostentatious approach, especially since Peter Jackson had master thespian Ian Holm to work with.

- I love the Cave Troll scene, but i hate the use of shaky camera movements in battles that take place before the invention of the camera.

- I also think that the computer generated Legolas who runs on top of the Cave Troll looks like shit, especially when he jumps off in the foreground of the camera.

- Fourth "false death:" Frodo is stabbed by the spear wielding Cave Troll. For some reason this particular "false death" is really played up. We don't just go into slow motion, we go into that terrible jerky slow motion that means that they didn't intend to use slow motion but just slowed down the film in the editing suite (hey, I had to learn something in film school!) And of course, we know that Frodo is wearing the mithril shirt, don't we? He's never really in much danger beyond getting a really big bruise from the impact of the spear point, right? So why the sad music, the super slow motion, all of the dramatic tension? Wasn't Frodo already stabbed in this film by the Witch King? Was that not dramatic enough for you, Jackson?

- Modern language: "Nobody tosses a dwarf!" I admit that I find this funny, but, for real? A joke about dwarf tossing, which is a bar attraction common to England and Australia in which patrons toss dwarfs in padded clothing across the room, to see who can throw the dwarf the farthest? The worst part about this line is that it is actually the beginning of a sub-plot which will be resolved in the Two Towers...

- Fifth "false death" is, of course, at the end of the Gandalf versus the Balrog scene. My only problem with this scene is that it makes it seem as though Gandalf, an angelic being who only appears to be an old man who is on par with Sauron in terms of personal power, can not do one single pull up. Now, maybe he's just using this opportunity to fight the Balrog, since someone was going to have to deal with it sooner or later, but I find that unlikely. Also, why the hell is Boromir stopping Frodo from helping Gandalf pick himself up?

- The bulk of my criticisms of The Fellowship of the Ring seem to lie in the way that Galadriel is handled. I don't mind at all the attempt to make her more sinister, but I do mind that it is done in such a heavy handed way, starting with her whispering in Frodo's mind within moments of entering her woods, to the over the top moment in which she says, "One who has seen the eye!" while flashing her own eyes as if to say: Hey, just in case you forgot what eyes looked like, here's my own impression of Sauron. But with two eyes instead of one. But, moving on...

- In the books the main reason that Galadriel shows Frodo (and Sam!) the Mirror of Galadriel is to test their resolve to carry out the quest assigned to them. In the movie I'm not quite sure what the point is, except to have Sauron's flaming eye show up again and for Galadriel to start talking like a man while being buffeted by a wind machine and overacting. All of the things that they see in the mirror in the book are clearly prophetic, and all of them happen. For instance, Samwise sees Frodo lying asleep, having been stung by Shelob, but doesn't understand what he's seen until he sees it again. It is Samwise who sees the ruin of the shire, which, unlike in the films, does occur, and Samwise is faced with the choice of leaving the quest to attempt to return to the shire to put things right. Frodo sees visions of the sea, which foreshadow his eventual voyage to the undying lands. And of course, this is the first time that Frodo perceives that the light in the east that he has been noticing since the quest began may just in fact be an eye, which is searching for him. All of this subtle meaning is lost in the film, cut down to the simple warning that if the quest fails the world will suffer under Sauron's rule. Well, no shit, Galadriel.

- Frodo, of course, turns the tables on Galadriel and offers her the ring, an act that seriously tests her own resolve. Much like the Bilbo/Gollum "gotcha" moment, I really would have preferred to see Cate Blanchett just play this scene straight, with very little special effects. Much like the tempting of Gandalf earlier, it shows us the power the ring has over the minds of even the mighty, and could have been one of the film's best moments. Instead we are overwhelmed by an overblown, shouted monologue.

- We could have spared the two minutes to include Galadriel's gift giving scene to the Fellowship. How else do we know from whence came Sam's elf rope, the hobbit's cloaks, and of course Gimli getting a lock of Galadriel's hair, which is such a sweet detail from the book.

- More jerky slow motion appears while Lurtz the Uruk commander searches for the Fellowship. Its not edgy, guys, its just poorly done.

- When Frodo's vision is magically enhanced by the "seat of seeing" that he is gripping onto in the film, and he sees for the first time the dark tower, I wish that they hadn't once again resorted to the flaming eye of Sauron filling the screen.

- In the film there is a great scene where Frodo explains to Aragorn why he must leave them. Its not in the books, and its a good addition that builds tension and allows Frodo to flee without us feeling like he abandoned his friends. Why then must he stop on the shore and once again have an angst filled moment in which he wishes the ring had never come to him, only to be answered by Gandalf's voice, repeating a line from earlier in the film, which gives him the hope to carry on? He already made the decision to go, so go already! I would have axed this scene, particularly in the interest of time, and just gotten him in the damn boat with Sam crashing after him.

- The sixth, and final "false death" of the film is Samwise almost drowning as he attempts to reach Frodo's boat. This does happen in the books, sort of, but Frodo reacts quickly enough that Sam is, again, in no real danger. The Samwise of the books certainly doesn't stop struggling and sink into the water, his face looking as though he has drowned. Sure, the shot of Frodo's hand grabbing Sam's which then grabs onto his is a nice shot, but by this point, which occurs after the death of Boromir, our emotions have been toyed with enough. Boromir was shot by three honking big arrows before he went down, and you expect us to believe that Samwise is going to drown for no good reason?

- "Let's hunt some orc!" Again, this totally pulls me out of the movie every time I hear it. As far as I'm concerned, he might as well have said, "Let's pick up some burgers before we go!"

Stay Tuned For Part Two: The Two Towers